Blue Marlin 4(+23=27) - Avondale 21 (Tom Dwyer Cup 3rd February 2010)

This entry should really be in a very small font as a footnote somewhere. The fixture had disappointment written across it in the league's handbook, and so it came to pass. Both teams walked up and down the Walton paddling-pool for 45 minutes and the visitors, other than in the third quarter when they managed to build a little momentum, never looked like overhauling the home team, who dug in well and weathered the assault with room to spare. Well, assault is perhaps too strong a word... it was more akin to leaning heavily against a stubborn door in the hope that it will swing open.

A couple of well placed lobs, at which the visiting keeper waved rather ineffectually as they passed - seemingly close enough to head clear, bolstered the home team's confidence. At the other end the shots failed to find their target with the precision that they might have done.

It's one way to spend a cold wet Wednesday evening, and the two pints of Tanglefoot that constituted the post match refreshment were probably justification enough for the trip.

Top Eye Injuries

While not wishing to suggest that anyone derives any pleasure from these unfortunate accidents, it is nevertheless emerging as a frequent diversion from the main game.... both in the water and out. In a bold move, it would appear, to the casual observer that, what goes around .... (where was Steve Eakins when this happened?

It seems to be the price of playing against an aggressive hole-man; although, arguably (and that was a key feature....) the daddy of all eye injuries (not documented here) did occur off the pitch...

So who do you think qualifies for the most sublime shiner: Feel free to vote with your comments :

Killer - 2010

Dave (the fox) Brooks took the final crown of the year in a star-studded Killer Comp. Despite his awesome firepower, the pre-tournament favourite, Mike Bond, was tricked by the wily old players ... all's fair in Killer.

Happy Christmas Everyone

* JK - The Konrad version of killer where only back-hand shots are allowed (named after the legendary Hungarian player Janos Konrad who can thread the eye of a needle with his back-hand from 25m).

Monday 20th December - Winner Dave Brooks - runner up Titanium Pete

Thursday 16th December - Winner Titanium Pete - runner up Steve

Thursday 9th December - Winner Thorpedo - runner up Big Greg

Thursday 2nd December - 4 way tie (no ball!)

Thursday 25th November - Winner (?)
Thursday 18th November - Winner Big Greg - runner up Pink Parkin

Thursday 11th November - Winner Angoose - runner up Fish Boy Beder

Monday 8th November - Winner Martin Brooke - runner up Titanium Pete

Thursday 4th November - Winner Dave Brooks - runner up Fish Boy Beder

Thursday 28th October - Winner Pink Parkin - runner up Focco

Thursday 21st October - Winner Focco - runner up Pink Parkin

Thursday 14th October - Winner Titanium Pete - runner up Big Greg

Thursday 7th October - Winner Titanium Pete - runner up Dave Brooks

Thursday 30th September - Winner Titanium Pete - runner up T-Bone

Thursday 23th September (*JK) - Winner Titanium Pete - runner up Steve
Thursday 16th September - Winner Titanium Pete - runner up Steve

Thursday 9th September - Winner Louis - runner up Dave Brooks

Thursday 2nd September - Winner Titanium Pete - runner up Dave Brooks

Thursday 26th August - Winner Big Greg - runner up Angoose

Thursday 19th August - Winner Titanium Pete - runner up Big Greg

Thursday 12th August - Winner Titanium Pete - runner up Focco

Thursday 5th August - Winner Lele runner up Steve

Thursday 30th July - Winner Big Greg - runner up Wayne Gibson

Thursday 23rd July - Winner Wayne Gibson - runner up Thorpedo

Thursday 16th July - Winner ?

Thursday 9th July - Winner Titanium Pete - runner up Dave Brooks

Thursday 2nd July - Winner Titanium Pete - runner up Allan Vitus

Thursday 24th June - Winner ?

Thursday 17th June - Failed to finish before the pool staff ejected us!

Thursday 10th June - Winner Titanium Pete - runner up Pink Parkin

Thursday 3rd June - Winner Lele runner up Maarten

Thursday 27th May - Winner Steve Eakins runner up Titanium Pete

Thursday 20th May - Winner Steve Eakins runner up Dave Brooks

Thursday 13th May - Winner Dave Brooks runner up Sean Donnelly

Thursday 6th May - Winner Steve Eakins runner up Titanium Pete
Thursday 29th April - Winner Focco - runner up Lele
Thursday 22nd April - Winner Focco - runner up Spud
Thursday 15th April - Matches
Thursday 8th April - Winner Allan Vitus - runner up Steve Eakins
Thursday 1st April - Winner Titanium Pete - runner up Allan Vitus
Thursday 25th March - Winner MKB - runner up Spud
Thursday 18th March - Winner Thorpedo - runner up Pink Parkin
Thursday 11th March - Winner Titanium Pete - runner up JP
Thursday 4th March - Winner Lele - runner up Thorpedo
Thursday 25th February - Winner Titanium Pete - runner up MKB
Thursday 18th February - Winner MKB - runner up Titanium Pete
Thursday 11th February - Winner Pink Parkin - runner up MKB
Thursday 4th February - Winner Titanium Pete - runner up Louis
Thursday 28th January - Winner Dave Hansen - runner up Focco
Thursday 21st January - Winner MKB - runner up Miguel Valentim
Thursday 14th January - Winner MKB - runner up Titanium Pete
Thursday 7th January - Winner MKB - runner up Titanium Pete

Killer - 2009

Pete took advantage of the small field of runners to capture the final Killer crown of the year.

Thursday 10th December - Winner Titanium Pete - runner up Dave Brooks
Thursday 10th December - Winner MKB - runner up Greg II
Thursday 3rd December - Winner Dave Brooks - runner up Robyn (first time on the podium)
Thursday 26th November - Winner Emanuele - runner up Jonnie Beder
Thursday 19th November - Winner MKB - runner up Dave Brooks
Thursday 12th November - Winner MKB - runner up Titanium Pete
Thursday 5th November - Winner Steve Eakins - runner up Titanium Pete
Thursday 29th October - Winner Titanium Pete - runner up Dave Brooks
Thursday 22nd October - Winner Louis - runner up MKB
...
Thursday 8th October - Winner Emanuele - runner up Titanium Pete
Thursday 1st October - Winner Emanuele - runner up Greg II
Thursday 24th September - Winner Titanium Pete- runner up Focco
Thursday 17th September - Winner Titanium Pete- runner up Michael Thorpedo
Thursday 10th September - Winner MKB - runner up Titanium Pete
Thursday 27th August - Winner Focco - runner up Steve Eakins
Thursday 6th August - Winner MKB - runner up Steve Eakins
Thursday 30th July 2009 - Winner MKB - runner up ?
Thursday 23rd July 2009 - Winner Titanium Pete - runner up Greg II
Thursday 16th July 2009 - Winner Focco - runner up Michael Thorpedo(?)
Thursday 9th July 2009 - Winner MKB - runner up Michael Thorpedo
Thursday 2nd July 2009 - Winner MKB - runner up Steve Eakins
.....
Thursday 18th June 2009 - Winner Steve Eakins - runner up Titanium Pete
Monday 15th June 2009 - Winner MKB - runner up Steve Eakins
Thursday 11th June 2009 - Andy Parkin - runner up MKB
Thursday 4th June 2009 - Winner Titanium Pete - runner up MKB
Thursday 28th May 2009 - Tiny Tim - runner up Dave Brooks
Thursday 21st May 2009 - Steve Eakins - runner up Michael Thorpedo
Thursday 14th May 2009 - Winner Wayne - runner up Dave Brooks
Thursday 7th May 2009 - Winner Titanium Pete - runner up Michael Thorpedo
Thursday 30th April 2009 - Winner MKB - runner up Michael Thorpedo
Thursday 23rd April 2009 - Winner MKB - runner up Steve Eakins
Thursday 16th April 2009 - Winner Steve Eakins - runner up MKB
Thursday 9th April 2009 - Winner Steve (DBTC) Eakins

........ (normal service suspended!)

Thursday 19th Mar 2009 - Winner MKB - runner up Focco
Thursday 12th Mar 2009 - Winner Titanium Pete - runner up MKB
Thursday 5th Mar 2009 - Winner Focco van der Vegt - runner up Andy Parkin
Thursday 26th Feb 2009 - Winner MKB - runner up JP
Thursday 19th Feb 2009 - Winner MKB - runner up Steve Eakins
Thursday 12th Feb 2009 - Winner MKB - runner up ?
Thursday 5th Feb 2009 - Winner Steve Eakins - runner up Dave Brooks
Thursday 29nd Jan 2009 - Winner MD - runner up (again!) MKB
Thursday 22nd Jan 2009 - Winner Young Kevin - runner up MKB
Thursday 15th Jan 2009 - Winner Steve Eakins - runner up Focco van der Vegt
Thursday 8th Jan 2009 - Winner Titanium Pete (clean sheet) - runner up Andy Parkin
(Unofficial - see bottom of this post)
Monday 5th Jan 2009 - Winner S Moorhouse - runner up MKB


Worthy of mention is Steve "who's the daddy" Moorhouse for his victory in the pre-season Killerfest (seven lives!!) at Putney on Monday 5th Jan. Whilst the event was not officially sanctioned by sport's governing body FISK (Fédération Internationale des Sociétés de Killer) the competition was very well attended and produced some of the most consistent and high calibre shooting that anyone can remember. MKB's not The Daddy now!

Avondale 10 - Croydon 8 (Surrey Div 1 & London - 14 September 2009)

Due to chronic fixture congestion, as the end of the season approaches, this game was converted into a double-header and with twice the incentive, both squads had close to their strongest teams on display (... except perhaps for the missing Moorhouse and the Seal Hunter).

The games between these teams can be finely balanced. The formidable Avondale offence typically creates the majority of scoring opportunities and, in no small part due to the excellent Croydon keeper, often converts fewer of them than they would expect to. On the occasions when they manage to get their full offensive line-up in the pool together, there aren't many teams that can beat them and tonight was a case in point.

Avondale scored first and, as it happened, were never behind in the match. A combination of their best shooting efforts and some elegant passing play saw the home team gradually overwhelm the visitors. The Sniper, getting back to his best after the recent nasty cycling accident, scored two particularly impressive goals from six or seven metres. It's not often you see the Croydon keeper watch the ball pass with no attempt to save, it happened twice tonight. The Beast From The East delivered one classic backhand that passed the keeper's head before he could react, but uncharacteristically he failed to convert two one on one opportunities having left his marker bobbing in his wake; it's not often you see Ivan turned in open play.... Respect!

For the first two quarters Croydon pegged Avondale back with well worked goals, but, the old goat between the posts should have had at least a couple of them.... perhaps his bifocals were steamed up?
The third quarter proved to be the turning point as Avondale dominated in offence and at one stage went four goals ahead. They defended the pit very well, stealing the ball again and again and forcing most of the shots from the arc. Their keeper failed to get out of the way of a couple of shots and suddenly they looked to be on a comfortable run in. As often happens their foot came off the gas (where's Stretch when you need that personal motivation). Croydon were now a little less enthusiastic about getting back to defend and a couple of careless misses from the Avondale attack gifted the visitors three break-away goals.

Although the final quarter began with the home team only a single goal ahead, they had the momentum and quickly eased clear, scoring the first two goals. They had two penalties, the first well saved by the Croydon keeper and the second taken by '007'! He might be a good keeper, but there's a limit to anyone's dedication to a cause and as Bond's long arm whipped forward to smash the ball into the back wall only the top of the keeper's cap and one hand were visible!

The indomitable Captain Louis kept himself out of the fray, but steered the ship to another victory.

Bar-b-que - Saturday 12 September

We rode our luck and enjoyed a beautiful, late-summer, afternoon at the Jonckers for the 'summer' bar-b-que:


Delicious lamb... eventually!


Profuse thanks to the Debra (and her loyal and highly effiicient assistant Maarten) for hosting the event.

More Photos

(Another Pink Parkin Production)

Oostende Tournament 5-6 Sept 2009

Another successful trip to the continent. What a fine bunch of athletes:


Our typically relaxed game start proved our undoing when we contrived to lose each of the first three games by a single goal. Trailing by four goals at the mid point of every game left us too much to do in the second half. Perhaps one Cimay beer too many on the Friday night?

An unusual salt water pool with added super-corrosive chemicals proved too much for Pink Parkin who blinked his way through 9 contact lenses on the Saturday. On day two he could barely distinguish light from dark and was relegated to goal where his inability to see the ball was mitigated by his considerable bulk. The boys rallied and won their final two 'play off' games on Sunday in convincing style.

Of particular note was the quality of the BBQ restaurant, the scene of Saturday evening's post game engorgement.


Not only was the food of excellent quality, our waitress' sunny disposition and elegant profile secured enough votes for her to win coveted Golden Ball award for service to the team, as Binder's smile confirms:

Jo impressed everyone with his moves on the dance floor (except the boyfriend of the girl he was dancing with).


The award for the ***ker of Oostende was awarded to the proprietor of the KouKou (or something equally daft!) restaurant. His simple sales prevention techniques were insufficient to deter the hungry chaps on Sunday afternoon.
"Can we see a menu?"
"We serve Chicken and Bread."
"Only chicken and bread"
"Yes, how many chickens do you want"
"...."
more award winning dialogue
"...."

Scene ends twenty minutes later with the boys departing and leaving a pile of brass coins on the table comprising exactly the 20.20 Euro bill - you don't mess with Avondale! (Actually the chicken was very tasty, although you don't get cutlery and the five of us shared the two hand wipes he was generous enough to give us - one per half chicken I guess.)

And finally : ask Dave to tell you the one about the Dutchman who translated an english menu into english. "Stop, stop your killing me!"