Avondale Waterpolo own rules

1.     It is advisable to eat something heavy at least an hour before a game

2.     It is better to go three goals down straight away, this will serve to find the right motivations that will make you play with a determination never seen before

3.     When the opponent swims off in counter attack, it is preferable to count until three before trying to catch up. It is fair and noble to give everyone a chance

4.     When your team is playing the “man up” ,the pass of the ball between team mates must be as slowly as possible and to the most marked player when he’s not looking

5.     You can’t win all the time ,it’s the taking part that counts…and you get one point

6.     It is advisable to do at least a dozen shots from 10 metres away, preferably from very awkward positions

7.     Before making a drive  , check there is another player who’s willing to drive in with you

8.     It is preferable to pass the ball in the middle ,when the hole man is in great difficulties

9.     In the event the game is played more than 10 miles from your home , here are some suggestions for excuses you could tell the captain:

-Unfortunately my cat has acute conjunctivitis and I need to put eye drops every hour ,this prohibits me to attend

-The little finger of my left hand has become increasingly swollen; I can’t even hold the ball

-I thought the game was to be played next Monday and I have already booked a holiday that I can’t cancel, I will be thinking of you all

10.  While the captain is talking ,you must tell the man next to you about the bender you went on the night before

11.  Obtain the minimum with maximum effort

12.  It is always possible to make the remark at the end of a game:”I think we could have won this”

13.  When your goalkeeper saves a penalty, it is preferable not to sprint for the rebound.

14.  Before passing the ball in the middle, draw a circumference with radius AB(with the centre in B) , draw a isosceles triangle ; if the triangle has two congruent sides then it will also have two congruent angles ; taking into account that in Euclidean geometry the sum of the internal angles of a triangle is always 180 degrees , divide 180 by the number of players of the opposing team whose girlfriend you secretly fancy and count up to the result of the division ; at that point someone will shout something from the bench and shoot immediately.

15.  It is best to call the time out when the ball is in the opposition’s hand or in our hand and with a clear opportunity to score

16.  It is advisable for everyone to go to away matches with their own car so as to make it difficult to find parking and optimise costs

17.  Substitutions during the game can be done like in basketball….the player from the bench can get in where he wants, when he wants and how he wants(waterpolo standards recommend the flying bomb)without waiting for the other player to be already out of the water

18.  It is possible to fart very loudly when sitting on the bench ,but only if the offender does claim it immediately after , otherwise it will not be considered valid and disallowed

19.  Better slow than fast

20.  Remember to let the referee know at every opportunity available what you really think about him; in the likely event of a disagreement , members of his family could be used 

April results

23rd Apr 2012
Avondale 1 - Sutton = 11 - 4
Surrey 1
Powerful display from the team against a very decimated Sutton  who could only bring 7 of their players to the game.Good defending and very efficient in attack ; Great show from new comer Alex...until his lungs supported him.
Post match refreshments slightly disappointing without the usual display of crisps....need to work on that


23rd Apr 2012
Croydon 2 - Avondale 2 = 10 - 4
Surrey 2

Well that wasn’t supposed to happen. A generally flat performance with little invention in attack, and way too many incidences of being caught on the break. Whilst our cause wasn;t helped by some young referees thinking that a head needed to be removed before a foul was conceded, the opposition showed that a new generation of players are coming through who are both fit and strong. To compete, we’re going to have to up our game. All hands to the pumps dear friends. We’re going to have to be better than this. training thursday

19th Apr 2012
Reading vs Avondale 2 = 10 - 5
London League 1
Poor warming up skills meant the extent of the loss was the same as the first quarter deficit. Reading proved how inept we dealt with being pressed. They played well. A few of our good players were off form on the night and unwilling to drive and pick etc. All in all: a painful learning experience, but a learning experience all the same. Maybe we’ll all be 10 minutes earlier to the pool for the next game.

15th Apr 2012
Avondale 1 vs Penguin = 8 - 20
London Premier League
Cheered on by the newly created Avondale mini supporters club and on the scoreboard with the fastest goal in water polo history , the Avondale first team just couldn’t keep up with the speed of a team that’s one of the top five in the country and ended up scoring more than half of their goals in counter-attack.
Much better play in the last two quarters but unfortunately too little too late; with more than a month until the next league game and marathon runners/child parenting/injured players to make a comeback , the future is bright.

12th Apr 2012
Avondale 1 vs Sutton = 15 - 8
London Premier League
First game of the London league season for Greg and co. against a Sutton team that were missing some key players ……and most notably a goalkeeper. This was all too obvious by the inability of any of those who tried their luck in goal , to stop or even try to stop anything that resembled a shot. At the call “ they don’t have a keeper” Jo definitely saw the opportunity to have a few cracks and oh god, he didn’t stop! Worth mentioning the legendary Pete in his first game outfield in over 30 years ,or was it 40?.Unfortunately it didn’t last long and after three majors , he was left watching the game from the side and yet again another shot from Jo.

29th Mar 2012
Avondale 2 vs Sutton and Cheam = 15 - 9
Surrey 2
Milos turns goal scoring hero. Focco manages to last the whole game. The old kingston lad is still a pain in the a££. Generally we make heavy work of a pretty weak side. Blayney gets greedy at the end. Sorry Brookey.

26th Mar 2012
Avondale 2 vs Blue Marlins = 17-16(after handicap)
Surrey Cup
When does a win not seem like a win? This one. The scoreboard said we’d lost but we’d actually won. Overcame a 10 goal handicap. The result only confirmed on the second pint in the pub after careful examination of our learned colleague on the table’s handwriting.
Notable moment: Focco’s red mist. Despite him chasing / hitting the opposing player around the pool, prompting the opposition subs to jump into the pool as support, the referee still didn’t see him as a threat. Mind you – he did score 5 or 6 goals while he was in the pool – exiting to the big exclusion sign. Classy.

15th Mar 2012
Avondale 2 vs Kingston = 8 - 8
Surrey 2
So much enthusiasm for the game that we ended up with too many players in attendance. Classic second team match where we failed to hold the ball for more than 10 seconds. A host of missed chances. Fitness looked pretty poor (something to work on)and in true tradition, when the whistle blew, Tim had one hand around the neck of a player with the other hand in a fist shape making "pretty waves". Immediately wrapped up, an outstanding display from Milos saved the day.